It’s often easy for women, mothers especially, to minimize the work that they do day in and day out in their lives. Because it can be monotonous and routine, we tend to skim over the dedication and love that it takes to do everything that keeps a family running. And so, as I talk about writing letters to your children filled with your story, some of you might be thinking that you have nothing of importance to say and definitely nothing that your children will want to hear. But I think that sharing your story is vitally important, not only to your life, but also your child’s. I want to share five reasons why you should share your story.
1. You Are The Only You
I know you know this, but you are the only you that God created. No one else has lived your life, learned your lessons, or experienced what you have in exactly the same way. And all those things have shaped you into the person that you are today. The woman that her children cherish and admire. And, whether they’ll admit it or not, don’t think any other mother could ever live up to.
Your children will read self-help books and memoirs about people they don’t know. And they will learn from them and apply some of the things that they learn to their lives. But your story is the one that matters the most to them. It is the one that they want to hear. All the small pieces that you think don’t matter will matter to them. So let them read about your story in such a way that they can go back year after year and learn something new each time they read it.
2. You Need An Outlet
Taking time for yourself isn’t easy as a mama. We’re constantly pulled in a million different directions and all of a sudden it’s 10 pm and we haven’t so much as taken a shower much less done something to relax. And, contrary to the way most of us live our lives, checking Facebook and Instagram is not really relaxing.
Why don’t you let writing be that outlet for you? A place where you can process your thoughts and opinions. Where you can think about your life with a little bit of a detached viewpoint and pare it down to what’s really important. I know that sitting down with a fresh piece of beautiful stationery, my pen, and my thoughts is one of the most wonderful things to me. Try it and see if it’s a relief for you as well.
3. You Can Share Experiences That You Otherwise Couldn’t
You’re never going to be able to sit at Chic-Fil-A with your child playing on the play place and, at the same time, dig into the weeds of parenting with your child as an adult. By writing our stories, experiences, and advice down in real time, it will give you a way to get as close to that as you can.
Can you imagine your daughter’s excitement at reading a letter that you wrote the day you sent her off to kindergarten on the day that she sends her baby off to kindergarten? She’ll know that what you wrote isn’t tinted by hindsight or modified into what you wish you’d done but is the honest portrayal of what happened in that situation. You won’t be able to share those first hand experiences without writing them down.
4. You Will Provide Them With A Safety Net
Let’s be honest, kids can do some pretty stupid things. And, sometimes, it’s something that you don’t have to know about and so they don’t really want to tell you. They might be embarrassed or ashamed or any number of things and don’t want to talk to you in person about it. By providing them with your experiences and advice in letter form that they can open whenever the situation arises, you are giving them access to you without them having to come to you. That way you’ll at least get to voice your thoughts in some way to them even if you never speak them out loud.
5. You Will See Your Child In A Different Light
When I sit and write a letter to my child it takes some of the stress off of my day to day parenting. When I’m writing to her on her wedding day I remember that just because she talked back to me today doesn’t mean that she will end up in jail. Writing letters for the the future helps me put our everyday life in perspective and reminds me focus on the big stuff. It’s hard to stay too mad that they drew on the wall when you’re thinking about them graduating high school and leaving for college.
How Do You Share Your Story?
While I prefer to share my story with my own handwriting on beautiful stationery, sharing yours could take lots of different forms. Writing open letters on a blog. Recording yourself telling your story. Writing a memoir. Keeping a journal. Whatever way you want to share your story I encourage you to share it. We will all be better for sharing our stories and those who read them will be better as well. And let us know in the comments how you share so that maybe we can try your way out as well.
